Not a Maths Problem…

I enjoyed learning Maths (a rarity in my locality)
Each problem was a challenge, a puzzle to solve.

The book unfolding new problems with every page,
And I had exhausted them all

On a hunt to find more, I heard of a castle full of books
Happy I was entering the palace, even more, be dwelling into problems that shook

Owner of the castle was happy too
With every problem solved, I would get a reward
A new book, a pat on my back,
Massage on my thighs or rub under the hook

I became faster at solving problems, and he more frequent with the rewards
Rewards are good, but now I was unsure

I would keep solving the problem assigned, with my head down holding the pen straight with frozen tips of my fingers
A gush of blood rushing through my heart, leaving my face white and cold
Was this I came to the castle for ???

With every passing day, the castle converted into a maze
A maze of emotions – anger, shame, anxiety, dread, guilt, overwhelmed me
And this maze, I didn’t like to solve

With every attempt to solve the maze, I got more lost
The sky was no longer blue and every eye shouted with disgust
I was shy and unsure,

So I tried to put a smelly ointment on my blistered soul
But sadly, everyone around me had a blocked nose
The ritual continued as it did,
Going to the castle like a broken ship,
Sinking into a bottomless pit
 
– A Broken Soul